Response

Response #
219
Category
Current experience of grief
Respondent details
45-54 | Female | British
Q1: What was the nature of your relationship with the person who died?
Loss of an unborn child
Q2: How has the person’s death affected you during the hours, days, and weeks that followed?
Ongoing
Q3: How, if at all, have your relationships with other people (particular individuals and other people in general) been affected by the bereavement?
Not too much but I have learnt to manage it.
Q4: Does the surrounding world seem any different to you while grieving? If so, how?
Yes. You become very sensitive to those around you who seem to have what you have lost.
Q5: Has your experience of time changed in any way?
No - only your own mortality.
Q6: Has your body felt any different during grief?
Yes. Lots has changed.
Q7: Has grief interfered in any way with your ability and motivation to perform various tasks, including paid work?
Yes
Q8: Is your experience of grief changing over time? If so, how?
Not really. Things will never be how you expect life to be.
Q9: Have you ever found yourself looking for the person who died or expecting that person to appear?
No
Q10: Are there times, places, and occasions that have made you especially aware of the person’s absence?
Yes
Q11: People who are grieving often report experiencing the presence of the person who died. Have you had any experiences that you would describe in those terms?
No
Q12: Do you still feel a sense of connection with the person? If so, could you say something about when you feel this and what the experience is like?
No
Q13: Since the person died, is there anything that you have been doing in order to feel close to them?
No
Q14: Is there anything that you do in order to avoid being reminded of the person or of their death?
No
Q15: Has anything in particular helped you to cope with grief? Has anything made you feel better or worse?
Being part of a community of others in a similar situation.
Q16: How understanding have other people been? Have others said or done anything that you've found especially helpful or unhelpful?
No. Most are not understanding as most don't see it as a loss.
Q17: How, if at all, has your experience of bereavement changed you as a person?
My outlook on life has been affected.
Q18: How, if at all, does grief over the death of a person differ from other forms of loss that you have experienced?
This is the death of a future life.
Q19: Are there any aspects of grief that you find particularly puzzling or difficult to put into words?
No
Q20: Are there any important aspects of your experience that we have not addressed?
Social exclusion. Losing a child then not having a child makes you a social outcast, especially as a woman. You are looked down on by other women. The support network that men have is different.